Well…man, this has been a lousy day with feeling like crap and worn out all day and I still feel that way and it’s 6pm…so, what the heck is going on? I did get out for a ride this aft but only 15 miles so that can’t be it…I did do 45 yesterday but I felt okay last night so that can’t be it…didn’t sleep much last night or the night before but that can’t be it since I never sleep…and all I did all day today was clean up some and do the grocery run this morning…along with the short ride and I am beginning to wonder if I’ve just overdone it riding 30 miles a day for the past 20 days in a row with a couple of 45′s and a 60 in there, too….I know I haven’t increased my calorie intake at all to compensate but that shouldn’t matter…I still have enough fat on me to burn for the extra miles so that can’t be it…I did go over 1600 miles for the year so far yesterday and I’ve only a little over 200 miles yet to go to have the first 1K outside for the year…crap, what if I’m just getting too old to keep this up? That would really suck and it’s something that I fear will happen all too soon…oh, well…there’s not a damn thing I can do about so I probably shouldn’t worry about it….but, I will…

Well…I guess I need to do a normal one of these before I get back to railing against the repubs who will do nothing to protect our children…so, slept okay last night but I think it was more from fatigue than anything else…I did get 45 miles in but my legs ran out of energy out at the beach on the last ride and that made the trip back here into the wind just brutal…and the rain we are supposed to get is missing us again so I think I may get out today after I have some lunch….have already got some cleaning done and took the light down and packed it away along with getting rid of the cups that never sprouted anything and cleaning up the dirt I spilled all over…and then I cleaned the microwave but it is starting to rust so I may have to buy a new one in a while…I do have another old one downstairs but it has no features and I like the short cut buttons that are on the one I’m using….I did get out and do the grocery run this morning but the damn stores are getting bare again so I didn’t get a lot of stuff…I did get some burger for 1.99 a pound at Meijers and they were even selling it in one pound packages instead of the huge 5 lb blocks so I got three and am going to make some sloppy joes later today….and Meijers even had the tire for the bike that I needed so now I’m set for the rest of the year with the slightly used one that will go on the back of the grey bike next….so now I’m heating up a chicken leg quarter I had left over and making some asparagus to go with it in the steamer for lunch and then I’ll try to get out on the bike after that…don’t mind getting a little wet if it sprinkles…we sure could use some real rain out here but I’m not holding my breath….more later…

Well…look, this is normally where I go on and talk about my days and what I did and what I’m going to do and thoughts about my life…but right now I just can’t….I’m shattered by the Uvalde massacre and my life really doesn’t seem too important for me to blather on about what groceries I’m going to get and whether I’m going to ride…unimportant bullshit at this moment…maybe later…but not now….

Well…when I started the day at 5:23 this morning, I really had no plan other than to ride the bike twice and then figure out what to do….after I got back here from the second ride, I decided to jump in the car, put the top down, and head over to Menards to look for some more lawn food since I fed it the last time almost a month ago…and if that sounds way too much, it is, unless you are cutting the amount going down to one half normal to adjust for the sandy soil out there…and I was pleasantly surprised to find that they had 10K sq ft bags on sale for 15 bucks so I grabbed one and came home to do the application…and this bag will be enough for 3 applications so I’m good til the end of July…after that, I planted the rest of the pepper plants from downstairs so I could shut the light off and will be cleaning up later…..and now I’m sitting here trying to decide what to do…that’s a Joe Wash line by the way…I had it in the back of my head to do 60 miles today to make up for the day off tomorrow but I think I’ll cap it at 45 and maybe a recon ride so that will make 50 or so for the day…so, all in all, a productive day that will keep the guilts away for the rest of the day…maybe….who knows? At least I’m not talking about working on the house….I did have a grey squirrel almost come up to me and take food out of my hand…if this one is in the yard when I open the door, she comes running toward me waiting for me to throw a slice of bread to her….kinda fun….maybe more later…

Well…another 5:23 morning to start things out but I don’t feel too badly about that….I did sleep okay so I hope it will mean I have energy for today since I may try for 60 miles on the bike…but that is all going to depend on when I get out for the first one…if it gets over 50 by 8am, that will be a good start….have been having a hell of a time getting my veggie seeds to sprout this year and I will need to re-think what I’m doing for next spring…might have to spend the big bucks to buy seedlings instead but that will cost 40-50 bucks when seeds only cost me about 10….I think I may have a cuke plant coming up at the end of the garden but I dumped a bunch more seeds in yesterday just to brute force it…just as I did with some green pepper seeds….I had to laugh yesterday when I rode by the rebuilt warehouse on the trail that has huge new windows that act like mirrors and saw that I have riders legs…lots of definition in both my thighs and calves and it looked pretty cool….have never seen my legs in action before and to see that all of the riding has had that effect was a little surprising….little things….it looks like I’ll have a day off the bike tomorrow if we get the rain were supposed to and it’s about time to take a healing day…and this place is so dusty even without doing any sanding or repairs in here that I will need to go over all of the walls and trim surfaces to clean them…and I noticed a film on basically everything in the living room so that will need to be done, too….not much to do today…just going to ride a bit and maybe do a little exploring down by the beach….no cooking today since I have leftovers to use up but I do need to plan meals for the rest of the week and get some stuff out of the freezer for it…don’t have room in there for any other protein so I’ll be eating out of the freezer for the next couple of weeks….more later…

Well…damn, another busy day that I thought was going to be a total loss with how I felt when I got up this morning….got the two rides in to start it off and then got the lawn mowed after that and it looks pretty good and I’m happy to get it done before the rain that is forecast for wed…ha,ha…yeah, that made me laugh…the rain forecast out here is probably the worst of any place I’ve lived and probably will be until the lake warms up and stops being the barrier to storms that is has been all spring…I did finally get over to the little sitting area along the trail that I have been looking at for a couple of years now and cut the grass and weeds that were about 3 feet tall in it…and cleaned up the all of the trash that was in it, too…then I raked up the cut grass and weeds and tossed them across the trail into the woods and brought the trash back here…it looks so much better and one guy I see on the trail everyday called me a “good samaritan” for doing it but it was more that the city had forgotten about it and I had the time and equipment to do it so why not? Now I won’t have to think about it twice every day when I ride by….and now it’s after 3 and I am done for the day….well…maybe one more ride later…we’ll see….

Well…darn, a 5:23 morning today and I am starting to feel the lack of sleep a bunch…pretty worn out this morning and my allergies are really sucking….have had a low level headache for weeks now and that is tiring, too…didn’t get much done yesterday other than ride the bike and I have lost all motivation to do anything so today may be the same but I won’t be able to get on the bike until almost 10 since it is only 39 outside right now and I am still wondering where the hell spring is…can’t remember such a cold May with the high today only being 60 or so and it only warming up into the 70′s later in the week…oh, well….I am going to plant the last of the plants from downstairs today so I can shut the light down and clean up down there…not going to have a lot of green peppers this year since I couldn’t get the seeds to sprout and that goes for the cukes, too….none of them sprouted and I have put in so many seeds that I went through at least 30 of them with no luck….might just plant the rest of them today just for the hell of it…at least my 12 bean plants look good and are growing along with the tomatoes….not much to do today…just need to wake up and get moving but I’m not sure when that will happen….and I will need to mow the lawn either today or tomorrow since it is supposed to rain wed, thur, fri and I wonder if I should get more food to put on the lawn before that? We’ll see….more later….