July 31st

Well… running about on time for a Sunday morning but I need to get moving here in a few minutes to get a ride in before the F1 race comes on at 9….I had thought about trying to get two rides in before that but that would have meant getting out without coffee and in the dark and that was just a bit too much for me…you know, I’m getting tired of always trying to get better…to lose weight, to eat healthier, to change my attitude for the better, and to deprive myself of things that I enjoy just for my health….it is just so damn much work and, while I can see the results and I feel better, it seems that I can’t just cut loose and ignore that for even a little while and just live…and I am stressed out about my checkup tomorrow reading the dire entries in mychart where my medical records are and where my cholesterol was too high along with my blood pressure…I’m afraid they are going to want to put me on medication for both and I just don’t want to do that yet….I have lost 3 inches+ on my waist since the start of the year and I can’t remember being at this weight since I was in my 30′s…so maybe it won’t be so bad….didn’t do much yesterday and today looks the same with just getting the rides in and watching races….I did take some burger out of the freezer to have tomorrow after my physical since I have been avoiding any meat but chicken over the past few weeks to help my cholesterol but most of it is hereditary and I’m not sure how much diet effects it…I guess I’ll see…not much to do today…just going to ride and then take care of the gardens….don’t have to cook today since I have leftovers and I’m going to make a big salad for dinner so I guess I’ll be under 1K calories for the day and that will help with the physical tomorrow…..I am a little pissed that all the riding I do isn’t the magic bullet I expected it to be with my health…but, I guess I’m getting old so I can’t expect much….more later….

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