May 21st

Well…man, up at 6:23 this morning and have 50 minutes to get on the bike to get two rides in today…but it’s still too cold to go out so I guess I’ll have to wait…and you know I’m not good at that…didn’t get a lot done yesterday and today will be the same with final qualifying for Indy this afternoon….and there is a nascar race on later…I am getting a little anxious about the biopsy tomorrow and knowing this week if I’m dying or not….just getting so damn tired of this crap and treatment hasn’t even started yet…had two meals yesterday and I am feeling so guilty of eating so much so I may just skip eating today…I don’t know why I’m even taking care of myself at all if the biopsy results are bad…some of the seeds in the garden annex have come up so it will be interesting to see what they are and if I actually get any veggies from them…the first flowers are getting ready to bloom out back and I can’t wait to see them….still don’t understand why the tomatoes are dying in the garden and I may not get anything from them this year…I don’t need the stress of looking at them gradually turning white….not much to do today….need to get on the bike soon but it’s only 49 and that’s too darn cold…and I’ve only had one cup of coffee and need a heck of a lot more than that….more later…

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