Well…it was a day today that was almost completely gray…it should have been fun…driving the new car out to GH to look at the water with the top down with good music playing…but I feel just so flat, so lifeless that I couldn’t enjoy anything today. And, it continues now…I broke my reading glasses and now they are held together with the leftover duct tape from the old car and that is how I feel today…like I’m held together with duct tape and it could unravel at any time….I know it’s temporary but I am getting so tired of never smiling, of never getting that feeling in your chest when life is just good and you want more of it…so, tonight will be a cocktail night and I’ll lick the wounds and try to start again tomorrow….and try to live up to my potential…I know, a weird thing to say for someone my age…