Well…okay, I’ve vented a lot today so far….and you may even get more later…and so I thought I’d dial it back a bit while I wait for lunch to cook. I have a question to ask…have you ever been taken care of? I mean when life has beaten you down or you’ve been really sick or when the time came that you just needed to fold up for a while? I ask that because I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t the caregiver, I can’t remember anyone asking how I was doing and really meaning it. I don’t mean this to whine about my lot in life but to try to figure out what has made things as they are…I feel like Michael Clarke Duncan in the Green Mile…the man who could take on the illnesses of others and then release them into the air, but I can’t.
Well…another weekend at home but I didn’t spend any cash so that positive kind of offsets the boredom that came with it….the dish is still screwed up so I have to call to have the receiver changed out today….it is good to have the internet hooked to the tv so I can bypass it….and there is never really anything I want to see anyway…I did have a mini marathon of bad old sci-fi movies yesterday after watching the Lions lose and that did relieve the boredom some. Started in on the bag of books from T and hope to get through them before the end of the month…they kind of act like drano for my head and clear out some of the cobwebs…but are cobwebs all that is left up there? It may be a danger….but one I’ll face….
Not much to do today…looking for work, of course, but I think it’s the day I have to start running since I’ve already gained some weight from having the bike parked…ugh…I am not looking forward to the pain in the legs that comes with it….oh, well….I’ll be back later with topics and a more in depth life comment but I slept in this morning…yeah, how weird is that? I think I’ll have one on the blackmailers that call themselves repubs….more later…
Well…I know I’m late and didn’t have any topics for yesterday but I had a few things to do and made a trip out to GH to hang with M for a while…it was good to see him and have a chance to get out of this place for a while….made the turkey soup and it came out good again…not much to do today..might be meeting up with K later to have a couple but that is about it…I’m going to go get a cup of coffee and come back later….after I read the paper…and the Sunday one is huge so it will be a while…
That didn’t take as long as I expected…the 12 pound newspaper had about 11 1/2 pounds of ads and nonsense so I’m back to continue…hmmmm….just when I was starting to have hope that the recovery was translating into hiring, the unemployment rate goes up…and the seesaw ride that has been my life heads back down again…and I am tired of listening to the “experts” talk that the reason is that the unemployed need more education to handle the new jobs that are being created…so, that means that I should go out and get a 5th degree? I have many friends that are successful with no degrees and the 4 that I have are only paper that doesn’t magically make me more talented….it’s what I have been saying to people that I talk to…that age trumps everything…and you can see this in the stories that are beginning to surface about the “retraining” that people have undergone just to find that they’ve been lied to and there are still no jobs for anyone over 40….I know, this sound a little bitter but wouldn’t anyone be when they have followed the rules and did more than necessary to make themselves valuable just to have the economy and business tell them that you are no longer needed when you still have something to give…more later…I promise I’ll have topics for later this morning…but, as you can tell, I’m in a valley right now…maybe some old movies will help…
Oh, go out and have a drink today…it’s the anniversary of the repeal of prohibition….
Well…it was a long day yesterday with not a lot to do and today doesn’t look much different…I am going to go out in a minute to get newspapers and then make coffee…or maybe make coffee and then go out….stayed up late last night to watch the Wings game and they just took the Ducks apart playing as well as I’ve seen this year…and there is another one tonight so that should be fun…the boredom is rising around my ankles like floodwaters, though, and I feel kind of trapped here without any cash….I could turn this into a reading day since I haven’t started the new books from T and I think that may be a good idea…I am going to make turkey soup with the carcass of the Thanksgiving bird…a ritual that I think I like as much as the actual dinner and it gives me some really healthy food to eat for a while…I do owe G one container whenever I make soup and I will bow to her dislikes and restrain myself from using whole peppercorns…or, maybe not….I don’t think I make it the same every time anyway….
Okay, it’s a pain in the butt to go out for papers in the winter….my car goes into insta-fog on the inside of the windows if I don’t warm it up for a while….on that note, I should start the wreck up and get going….more later…one last thing…how is it that I go to bed at 12:30 am and get up at 6:30 and feel better than when I go to bed at 11….I’m just a bundle of weirdness I guess…
Well…this being broke crap is starting to be a pain in the butt…I would at least like the option of going out and doing something even though I probably wouldn’t…it’s like I’m trapped here with my head barely above water and it continues to rise inch by inch. One consolation, I’ve had two nights of good sleep for me…only up a couple of times each night…maybe there will be a pattern here? Hope so….I guess you have to take the small victories as they come. But that doesn’t relieve the boredom…and, there’s not much to do today…the damn dish is screwed up again and they are supposed to come to fix it today but that is about it….and not much of a weekend either….but I guess I’ll have to make the most of it and just read a bunch and cook. I will have one large topic for later today…Obama has lost me and I now see him as no more than another political hack that is breaking the law with his refusal to honor our treaties and prosecute the torturers….more later….
Well…a pretty low-key day yesterday but it was interesting with the first real snowfall….tell me one thing…how does falling asleep on the couch for 15 minutes keep you from sleeping for 3 hours? That’s been happening some lately and it gets frustrating not sleeping…but, after the complaining, I did sleep okay last night…how’s that for strange? Oh, well…I think I will keep up the no drinks thing for a few days…or probably until Monday at least…I just feel so much better that it’s not worth it any more. It helps that I’m broke….but I am going to get some groceries since the leftovers are finally gone…except the turkey carcass for soup, that is…not much to do today…I think I’m going to start running again but I’m not looking forward to it…it hurts way too much but I have to do something for exercise since I can feel my fitness draining away even after a couple of days…and it gets worse as you get older…it takes you months to get into shape but about 4 hours for it to all go away…maybe not 4 hours but it seems that way…more later…
Well…another night out in Ada and I lost at pool again….I guess I’ll have to start concentrating more…and I did not sleep at all so my brain is just idling…can’t get it to start…life looks really quite strange at 3:08, and 4:12, and 5:03….and still looks that way right now at 7:43…not much to do today…have to go out for supplies but that is about it…still trying to conserve cash so it looks like I’m in for the next week or so…oh, well…man, I am so tired that I’m going to put this on hold for a while…back later…
Okay, back for a while after coffee and I feel just a trifle better…bet you haven’t seen trifle used in a sentence in a while…the snow was a little bit of a shock this morning but it is December in Michigan so you kind of expect that…and people were not being stupid on the roads so far so that is a plus…I’ll see more after I go out on the e-way this morning…it is kind of depressing knowing the bike riding season is over….I think I’ll start doing the maint on it that it needs and clean it up….it’s going to be a complete veg day today…tuesdays are starting to wear on me but I am grateful that I can just kind of curl up and watch some movies…I’ll be back with topics for later….more idiocy by the repubs that has left 2 million people without UI benefits…
Well…running a little late this morning for no real reason…got caught up in the season finale of Dexter and what better way to start the day than to visit with a serial killer. That’s a joke….had fun last night, did go out and have a couple with G but was a good boy when I got home so I feel okay today. There was bad news, though…T hit a deer with her car and did some damage to it…I guess that’s to be expected here in deerville but it’s still not cool especially when the car was just fixed. Not much to do today but Ada…I do need to get some money coming in since I’ve got about 8 bucks in my pocket and 5 of that will go for coffee…I hope I don’t have to quit doing the morning coffee thing…I do get topics from it after all….we’ll see…more later…
Well…a nondescript Sunday full of boredom…but the Roku helped to keep me going until the Wings came on…I am so happy that Thanksgiving is over so I can get back to my normal eating routine…I think I’ve gained 10 pounds and I don’t feel good about it. I will be able to get out on the bike today and I’ll probably do 20 or 30 miles to make up for my laziness over the last week…yep, that’s guilt you hear and you know I’m pretty good about it…oh, the Wings played a great game yesterday and won another one…that made me a little bit happy but just a little. Not much to do today….and that’s probably good…just don’t feel like doing anything….yeah, sounds like the blacks are coming back…I may have to curl up on the couch and let it come…more later…
Well…It’s been a little more difficult than usual having something to say lately and I really don’t know what the problem is…but I’m going to keep trying until the block goes away….and you’ve seen this before so you shouldn’t be surprised, I’m not but that is because I’m the one that has to live inside this head….and it gets scary in here at times. But, that is another topic for another time. I am getting to really like the Roku my boys bought me…listening to Pandora right now and the last two days have been lots of streaming movies, tv shows, etc. I can see why the cable and dish companies are becoming concerned…if I could get the Red Wings on the thing, I would cancel the dish tomorrow…maybe after the season is over…it is kind of nostalgic to listen to music Sunday mornings; it takes me back to the days on WLAV when they had a show called “Jazz Brunch” that I would put on and read my newspaper to…I’m still waiting for the first commercial on Pandora…the boys said they have them but it’s been a couple of days so far nothing…I’m not complaining mind you, just musing.
Not a lot to do today..it is going to get warm enough to take the bike out again and I have been watching the temp to see when it gets there….going to make a pork loin in the slow cooker since most of the turkey is gone or I froze it to make the turkey soup that I promised to G….need to get back on the veggie thing for a week or so to make up for all of the normal food I’ve been having…does anyone else get tired of pie? That’s about it for now…have to get the rub made for the pork loin and read the rest of the papers so I’ll have topics for later…I should feel worse than I do today…there were manhattans involved last night….more later…