Well…darn, it is such a pain in the butt to go to bed feeling okay and wake up depressed as hell…that might have had something to do with how worn out I felt yesterday….and it’s only 52 degrees out there so there won’t be any beach trip today with the high only around 70….and it still hasn’t rained out here in almost a month and I think I’m losing the battle to save the lawn….and after all of the work I did to make a lawn, that really sucks….at least I’m keeping my garden alive and the first flowers have started to bloom at the back of the house…but my tomatoes are showing the stress and look pretty odd with the leaves kind of shriveled looking…you know, I’m at the point where I just don’t care about much anymore and if they die it will be met with a shrug….I think I slept okay last night but don’t feel like it and I wonder if I can just take the day off sometime soon? Haven’t done one of those in a long time but I know it will depress me even more if I do….and that’s the problem…it’s a catch 22 that I have to gut my way through and I’m tired of it….oh, well….not much to do today…did laundry yesterday so I don’t have that to do today so I guess I’ll just try to find a doctor this afternoon and then over to verizon tomorrow….but I don’t want to do either of those….don’t want to do anything….more later….

Well…not sure what the heck is going on but I have been worn out all day today….so, I’m lying here on the couch typing this one since it was just too much work to get up and sit up…I did get two bike rides in today and went pretty hard on them so that may be part of it…but, I have been almost dizzy at times, too, so that is weird or it may not be…I’ll have to check on how much I ate yesterday…. a ham sandwich and a handful of chips for one meal, and two sloppy joes and a handful of chips for the other…so that’s about 520 for lunch and around the same for dinner….under 1200 for the day isn’t enough with burning 1200 on the bike every day….and I went out to the beach and got a good swim in playing in the waves and took a long walk over the new beach and couldn’t believe how may zebra mussel shells there were in the new sand….I think they still need to level it since there are holes in it you could fall into….it was a little strange how solid the new beach was with being more than 50% water yesterday….I was the only one on the beach when I got out there and there were only a couple of other people when I left around 11:30….but it was windy and a little cold so I didn’t stay long…it was warmer in the water than out so I didn’t get any color today and that was probably a good thing…..my skin can use the rest…okay, that’s enough….getting tired of doing this and just want to veg….

Well…running about on time for a Sunday and had a nice surprise when the store I get my paper from that is close to me is back open again….and that makes it only a mile or so I have to travel…and the steering in my car is getting better every time I drive it so that is a load off…must be getting the air out of it and that is cool….slept okay last night and didn’t wake up til around 5 but just rolled over and slept until 6 or so when I got up…so, I feel okay this morning and will be getting on the bike by 7:15 or so so I can get two rides in by around 10…..not sure if I’m going to go out for a swim today…just don’t feel like it so I probably won’t….still didn’t rain at all yesterday and it looks like the rain has set up south of the Michigan border so we won’t be getting any today and that kinda sucks….need to water the lawn today and that may just be all the work I do….but I do need to get back to work on the house soon and that will probably start this week…so much for taking the summer off….not much to do today…need to read some news and have another cup of coffee before I get on the bike and I still can’t understand why I feel the need to get out so early…don’t have anything to do really but I guess that’s just me….one day, I am going to just take a day off and veg out…yeah, right…that’s not going to happen….more later….

Well…darn, another day with getting nothing done and I am depressed about that…oh, I took care of the normal stuff like riding the bike and taking care of the garden but nothing else….so, tomorrow has to be different…I have a bag of topsoil so I can do some more patching of the yard and I really should get on that even as I lose more lawn every day since it never rains out here and I can’t afford to keep it alive…okay, that’s not true, I can afford it but damn, a hundred bucks a month just to keep the lawn alive? Oh, well…I did get out to the beach for a short swim this morning after doing the bike rides but even that was a bit of a pain with the running event they had going on that used my trails for it…on the way out, I had to ride the roads the whole way with the trail clogged with runners but that worked out okay with the roads that were closed for the run…and it seems that the steering on the car is getting better and it may be that it had some air in it after I forgot to check the power steering for a year and it was really low…and it looks like I don’t have a coolant leak…checked it a few minutes ago and it is still full so that’s good….I think I need to start up on the house again and that will probably happen this week….need to start on the trim in the dining room and do the bathroom door and frame so maybe I’ll get that done this week….once that is done, the painting will go pretty fast….I did pick my first 5 beans from my plants today and I hope I’ll have enough for a meal by the end of the week…probably should have planted a bunch more of them but 16 should be enough….and I think my first flowers at the back of the house are going to bloom soon since they have lots of buds on them and I can’t wait….still hasn’t rained out here in almost a month and the stuff that was supposed to come today is falling apart over the lake…again…crap…oh, well…time for some tv…

Well…damn, I feel just like I did when the Russians installed the asshole trump and I just can’t read the news….but I will try to get this one done before I get on the bike….slept okay last night but I really stayed out at the beach too long yesterday…had to slather myself in aloe last night to keep my head and face from peeling and I can still feel the tightness in my back from the sun so I think it’s a good idea that I’m not going out there today…my skin needs the rest….I had squirrel boxing in my yard under the tree by the water container yesterday…a young black and a young grey squirrel were playing and then sat on their haunches and had a slap fight that was just so funny…and I had three kittens in the yard that I saw a  few days ago but this time the momma wasn’t with them….it’s going to be a loud day up here with all of the activity going on downtown over the weekend…lots of craft sales and concerts so I may have to ride over there and take a look…and there is a 10K going on at the park…and we had the fifth cruise ship moored here yesterday which I still can’t figure out…but at least this time they had shuttles to take people around the city…not much to do today…just going to get the rides in and then take it easy the rest of the day…need to feed the garden and the flowers when I get back from the rides and get started watering the lawn…..the goldenrod flowered along the trail yesterday and I can feel it today…my head is stuffed up and I have a headache already so it is going to be bad out there on the bike….more later…

well…look, with the overturning of Roe by the corrupt SC today, I am so depressed by the damage this is going to do that I really can’t pretend that life goes on…it doesn’t and me writing anything else today would be too much of a pretense and papering over the gravity of this outlaw ruling…so, I won’t be back today for anything else….I just can’t….

Well…only up once at 5:10 this morning so I guess that is a win but I don’t feel like it….pretty darn worn out and I hope the coffee starts to work soon….I don’t know how it happened but I am now getting three days out of a pot of coffee when it’s always been two…I wonder if that has something to do with feeling worn out? It was an okay day yesterday and I did get out to the beach for an hour or so and it was cool to watch the dredges in operation depositing sand on the beach to make it twice it’s normal width….the depositer was connected to the dredge with pipes from over a mile away and I was surprised how quiet it was when in operation….can’t wait to ride out there and see how much they got done yesterday….it’s going to make it a really long walk to get to the water when they are done….didn’t get anything done yesterday but water the lawn and today is going to be the same other than I’m out of leftovers so I’ll need to cook today…..and I need to take something out of the freezer for later in the weekend…or maybe I’ll make some of the breaded chicken fillets that I have lots of…..not much to do today….just going to get on the bike here in a minute and take it easy today…will be back to the beach later this morning to get a swim in and get some sun but don’t have any plans other than that….might have to go to Meijers to get some beer since I like to have one on the beach when I go out there and only have one left…but I won’t be on the beach over the weekend with it being so busy out there so maybe I can wait til next week….more later…

Well…as I talked about earlier, I was curious about what kind of animal was tipping over my water container that I put out every day for the animals around here…as I was closing up the blinds for the night a few minutes ago, I saw what it was…a family of three skunks were in my yard drinking from it and that is just too cool…I don’t think I’ve ever seen a live skunk in my long life and to add a new experience is pretty damn neat…..they are quite strange looking animals with their long black and white fur…and the big one was motionless while drinking for a good 5 minutes…so, to go along with the deer, turkeys, and cats, we now have another species to add to the list and that makes me smile…..pretty damn cool….

Well…just wanted to warn everybody that I am heading to the beach to get a swim in so there won’t be a political one here until a bit later…I finally got to see the dredges putting sand on the beach this morning and it looks like they are going to extend the beach by a lot more than the 40 ft they started with and that is pretty cool but makes it a much farther walk to get in to swim…. and the noise is going to be a bit much but I can go all the way to the south end of the beach so it won’t be too bad….more later….

Well…that was a crappy day…had to make many calls to shut down the assholes that think I want to listen to their bullshit music in my house and that always depresses me…and I am pretty depressed today…I did sleep okay since the firestarters out here didn’t light the whole damn neighborhood on fire like they did Tuesday night so I didn’t have to eat smoke in my house….okay, that’s enough of that…I did realize why the A-10’s I saw yesterday looked so different…they had a pointed fairing over where the rotary cannon normally sits just under the nose of the plane….so no armament and that just raises more questions about what state they were in….heading for scrapping? Who knows? Didn’t get much done yesterday but didn’t need to and I don’t think I’m going to do much today….I’m just so tired from being depressed that I want to take the day off until the hearings come on this afternoon….did just see something strange in my yard….a mother cat had her kittens playing in my yard until an opossum started walking through where they were and the kittens climbed up my big tree and the momma attacked the opossum….all while baby squirrels sat on the power lines watching what was going on….and some animal dumped my water container over for the second night in a row and I wonder what it is….I really wish that was all I had to think about out here…but the noise is going to start again and I’m going to have to deal with it all day again….and that is bullshit…need to get a couple of e-mails out to the city government today to bitch about it…when do I get a day off from that? Not much to do today….at least my teeth don’t hurt much so I guess that’s something…just going to get on the bike here in a few minutes and I wonder why? Not enjoying it much lately and it has become more of a job than anything else and that is a function of the depression, too….so, do I just veg the day out and elevate my guilt response or do I drag my ass out off the couch and get on the bike? Yeah…you know the answer to that….on the bike and hope that it gets better…damn, I hate the people out here….at least I have tiny little beans on my bean plants….and in a few weeks I’ll have fresh beans to eat…more later….